A few thoughts after recent events.
"Act your age" - I've dated someone 50 who thought he was 20. If you are 40 please do not act as though you are ready to head to Boca to play shuffleboard and eat dinner at before it's dark outside.
"I want kids. Maybe. Sort of" - This is a yes or no question. Mind you, I wasn't sure if I wanted to mingle my genetic material with yours but at least know where you stand. Given that in this day and age all I need is a credit card, Internet connection and a turkey baster to have a kid, I know where I stand.
"I called ahead to the restaurant to see if jeans were ok" - That clears things up. I had assumed when you opened the door that I was early and you hadn't changed yet. While it may be fine to wear jeans to the restaurant, we were also going to the theater. I took time to dress up since it was a date and all. Nice to see you put in such effort.
"You should tell her you hope she gets cancer" - To my boss? Are you serious? How is this appropriate adult behavior? The fact that I had a family member who was diagnosed with cancer a mere three weeks before you uttered this statement shows a remarkable level of insensitivity.
"You're a good kisser" - Yes I am. Thanks for mentioning it. While we're at it, could we clear up that kissing is all about lips. It is not about you sticking your tongue down my throat for ten minutes. This isn't fun for anyone and if I wanted that I'd be dating a Labrador retriever.
"I don't go to concerts unless I have great seats" - Well aren't we picky. For me it's an evening out and a chance to hear some good music. I can hear just as well from row 27 as I can from row 2. Thankfully the concert I was kind enough to invite you to was open seating.
"I like the outdoors" - Great! Me too. Do you ski? Snowboard? Kayak? Mountain Bike? Hike? Oh you walk. Well that's like hiking except for the trees, dirt and bugs. Going to a Starbucks is not considered an outdoor activity.
"I don't want to get in the way of your school" - Thanks for that. Given that I have worked my butt off for the last three years and this was my last semester I appreciate the understanding. Why then during finals, did you have attitude with me when I couldn't spend time with you? I've been in school for 3 years. I've known you for 2 months. Which did you think was my priority?
"I really like my life nice and quiet" - That's great that your life is so quiet. I assume my life will be quiet too. When I'm 90. Right now, I'm a bit too busy enjoying the noise.
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