Science Friday

Today I was lucky enough to sit in on the live broadcast of NPR's Science Friday. It was two shows (two hours each). The first hour was devoted to Cambridge Science Week and had panelists discussing recycling and green efforts in the city of Cambridge.

The second hour was completely fascinating. It was all about stem cell research. I have read a lot about this subject but it was great to hear even further explanation about how it's done and what the potential could be with further research.

I know that stem cell research is one of those hot button issues like abortion that just gets people all wound up. I have a very scientific mind and am a firm supporter of this research. I do understand the "life begins at conception" people and why they would have this belief. One gentleman who called in was completely in this camp. When one of the panelists was playing devil's advocate and asking this man if there was a fertility clinic on fire and there was a six year old girl or a tray with twenty frozen embryos and he could only save one, which would he save? This man hemmed and hawed and finally said that if he was a firefighter he would save whoever was closest to the door! I asked my dad, a retired firefighter of twenty five years, which he would do and the answer was clearly the little girl.

I respect the caller's right to his own opinion but it annoys me to no end when people bullishly insist on their belief as being the correct one but can't back it up. Stem cell research is very subjective. It's easy to say it is wrong until it is your child with diabetes. Or mother with Parkinson's. Or husband with Alzheimer's.

Tension in Virginville

So I received word from R. today that's he's a bit peeved at me for blogging about his virgin situation. He thought I should not have told anyone. As I pointed out to him, I told him I was going to post on that topic. Additionally, if this had happened to me (not that I would ever in a million years date a 27 year old virgin, mind you) I would be writing about it as well. He was so upset that I was really quite taken aback.

Then it occurred to me, the downside to dating a virgin is that you are not getting any. I think that R. is feeling a bit pent up and looking for an outlet. Instead of sex, it was being mad at me. This is not my problem.

He said I had no integrity and was poking fun at him about this situation. It's a funny story and I would be remiss in my duties as someone with a great sense of humor not to share! The gall of someone who considers himself the "Designated Deflowerer" questioning my integrity is really priceless.

Call me Boo

So my baby brother, the one who coined the Boo of the title, has had this nickname for me since he could talk. My real name was too tough for him to say so thus I am Boo.
I think it's great that he still calls me this and it comes in handy for purposes of this blog.

My brother does not have a computer so he calls me for all his Internet needs. Is so and so dead or alive? What do you feed a Venus fly trap if you don't have flies? Where did the guitarist from Alice in Chains go?

Usually they provide a distraction so I don't mind. My brother figures that since I am getting my hard earned IT degree shortly, it's really just me using my education.

This evening while talking to him, he asked me to find out something else for him. I laughed and said I was his Google. He one upped me and said that no, I was actually his "Boo-gle". That just cracked me up to no end!

Like a Virgin

So today I heard from my friend, let's call him R. He's in his upper 30's. Apparently he's been seeing a girl, we'll call her Mary. She's in her upper 20's and very religious. They've been out as a part of a group and hadn't even held hands. Granted there is a very large height difference that may also preclude hand holding!

Apparently they spent all weekend together. Cut to the evening and he's going to sleep over. Of course, he's assuming that what happens when you have a date and sleep over will happen. So they are in bed and that's when she tells him that she's a virgin. The timing could have been a bit better!

By the time you are post college, you pretty much assume that once you're in bed with someone they have done this before. And there is a huge difference between being a teenage virgin and an almost 30 year old virgin.

I think that with someone who's religious and held out this long there can only be one reason. Saving yourself for marriage. This is not a fun situation. If she does decide he's the "one" what's his obligation? Are you pledging something about the relationship that's just started? What if she has religious remorse about the whole thing? Is her family going to show up to beat the crap out of you? The one positive I pointed out to him is that if he's terrible, she won't know!

R thinks he should do research. I don't think there is a "Deflowering a Virgin for Dummies" book. He also seems to be viewing this as the Fates trying to tell him something about his life, particularly after a really bad relationship. I guess the Fates are telling him not to have sex. Hmm, fate does work in a mysterious way!

The Young and the Clueless

After an atrocious Friday the 13th it was a relief to see my good friend for an evening out after work. She and I had a lot to catch up on and decided to walk through the Common and chat. We weren't quite sure where we were going but the walk was enjoyable. We were both engrossed in our conversation when we finally looked around. Our actually conversation went as follows.

Me, looking at the barricades and Adidas trailer: "Did we miss something? Looks like some sort of sporting event went on earlier."
Her, looking around too, "Yeah it does."
Both of us, "Duh. They're setting up for the marathon!"

In our defense, we had both had really tough weeks and were a bit distracted. I am confident we would have figured it out once we walked over the finish line!

We finally made out way to a bar we had been to before. Another friend joined us and we were having fun, until the bar took our bar stools away. Apparently they have problems with their patrons "stumbling over the bar stools" and "fighting with the bar stools" so they take them all away. It would seem to me if you have people tripping over a bar stool or jousting with them, maybe you shouldn't serve them so much alcohol.

Finding ourselves vertical, we took being seatless as our cue and walked up the street to a different bar with seats where we finished our evening.

Failure is not an option

"It is on our failures that we base a new and different and better success". Havelock Ellis

Actually it is an option and it seems to be happening quite a bit lately. For me it's on the heels of a great personal success so it's kind of dampening my spirits despite my best efforts. There are a few others in the same boat as I am.

While failure can be in the eye of the beholder, it doesn't help when it's you who are the one it applies to. I certainly understand the whole "when one door closes another opens" thing but for once can't both be doors stay open?

As for the author of the quote above, if anyone knows about overcoming obstacles it would be him.

Hit me

It is know amongst my friends that I will, in a social situation, attract the oldest man in the room. I'm not sure why but I've changed my perfume, just in case.
A recent new trend has caused me some alarm. It seems that I am attracting 20 year old boys with depth perception problems. More precisely my car is attracting them. In the last 4 months I have been rear-ended in traffic twice. The most recent occurred this evening on the way home.

When you have one main road in and out of town you sit in rush hour traffic. I was in this traffic, not moving quickly and lost in a reverie when I realized my car was being pushed forward and had stalled. Given that I was in gear and still had my foot on the clutch I was a bit puzzled until I saw the young man in the Jeep behind me getting out of his car. I got out of my car and told him to back up so I could assess the damage. This is when he informed me that his car does not go in reverse. Reverse is broken. What? How is this possible? I must have shot him a look because he took a step back from me. Fortunately it was low enough speed that there was no damage to my car. But still, no reverse??

Back in Time

Blogger Kathy Sierra of the Creating Compassionate Users blog received disturbing and graphic death threats. The prevailing assumption is that they are due to her gender, not so much about what she says or lectures on. Pure misogyny it seems.

As a female who has worked in the high tech field, I can attest that it was a "boy's club" at times. I have a very thick skin. I grew up a tomboy and can hold my own. But really, should I have to? I know that this is not a perfect world but shouldn't I be judged on my abilities and not if I'm wearing a skirt? No one should ever be touched at work but I've been grabbed, pinched, leered at, and propositioned by coworkers. One even put his hand on my knee and called me "sweetie" in a training I was leading. My grandmother is the only one who ever got to call me sweetie.

Moving to the quiet world of biotech has been a relief and I haven't been touched once. But if I go out and flirt at a bar, I'm a slut. If I assert myself or rebuff unwanted attention, I'm a bitch.

It's 2007 and it saddens me that we are still having these incidents and conversations. With all hell breaking loose in the rest of the world, could we stop viewing women who are working in "non-traditional" industries as a threat?

Full Disclosure

I find myself in the lucky position of having new people in my life that, for the near future anyway, have become part of my life. This brings me to wonder just when it is that you should fess up your past. I'm not talking about the little stuff here. While everyone has their issues and baggage, at what point do you roll out whatever your issue is? I try to go by the "when the time is right" method but in my current case, I'm not sure that's the best. Granted, it depends what your particular skeleton is but for me it's something that helps to explain why I am the person I am today. It's not pleasant or easy but it's a discussion I usually have to have.

I find that this time I am feeling a bit like a petulant child having to do this. It's the feeling of "how dare this interfere with my life" which is silly since it is my life. I think it's just the mood I am in.

Weekend Fun

This was quite the weekend for me. Even though I am crushed with homework, I was a social butterfly. Friday night was out with a friend to celebrate his birthday. The evening did not turn out as I had planned but was quite a bit of fun. I wasn't anticipating staying up until all hours of the night but when you are in an Irish pub talking to Irish people, the beer and conversation flow quite easily! There were two older couples who just a blast, even if they kept insisting my friend was my husband :-) I'm not quite sure the number of beers I had but I will admit to being a smidge tipsy. Little flashes of forgotten moments keep coming back to me. Like all of us being on our hands and knees looking for a dropped ring.

Saturday brought a wonderfully overdue 90 minute massage. I was jello when I finally oozed my well lubricated self off the massage table. Then it was home for a much needed nap.

The evening brought dinner at one of my favorite Greek places (mmm feta) and a movie. I saw The Namesake. The book was wonderful and so was the movie. I greatly appreciated that my new friend, CBM, did not tease me for crying.

Today was breakfast. I love breakfast out especially at a little diner. Any day that starts with bacon is alright in my book. The rest of today was homework and writing my research paper.

All in all a very interesting, varied and good weekend!

So Mad I Could Spit

About three weeks ago all heck broke loose for me at work. While I finally got recognition that I have been working two jobs, I was told that I "don't fit with the group" and that "my skills would be better suited doing something else" and my boss offered her "full support to help me find somewhere else within the company so I can succeed". Whole lotta lies right there. After meeting with HR and finally getting the scoop, I learned my boss has been lying to my face. What she has been telling me is not what she reported to HR. By being sneaky and underhanded, she has also sabotaged my chances of transferring within the company. I am absolutely livid.

So I must be getting laid off or fired, right? Nope. Instead I am in limbo. I am being asked to still do both jobs but with no recognition or promotion, the motivation is not really there quite frankly. My HR person even agreed that the group is not treating me fairly. Great, thanks for the validation.

While I did plan to get a new job when I get my long-awaited degree in a few short weeks, I do not appreciate the needless stress that my boss is putting through.

Spring Break and Wearing of the Green

Well this week was Spring Break. I am officially at the halfway point of my last semester! It also brought a 70 degree day and ended with a foot of snow. Gotta love the New England weather. I took a day off from work Friday to get caught up on stuff. I had two very nice dinners with my new friend as well. For purposes of these pages and my Mom, he will be referred to as CBM. He's very good company and I am always grateful when someone makes me dinner!

In addition to clearing cars and shoveling today it's a holiday. Happy St. Patrick's Day! It's a holiday in my family so I am getting ready to head out to eat my fill of corned beef. I do enjoy that.

Dinner and a Show

Add another perfect date to my list. Saturday brought dinner and a show and perfect company. The meal at The Ivy was amazing. It was Italian tapas that started with a really good salad. The show was hysterical. The rest of the date was just perfect :-)

Coldest Date Night Ever

So after my lengthy Starbucks date and a very long phone conversation after class on Monday, he asked if I wanted to meet him in Harvard Square after work on Thursday.
I was happy to be seeing him again before our date on Saturday. The only problem, the bitter, bitter cold! It was so cold out Thursday night I think it was the coldest night of the year.

We met at a coffee place and had cocoa and chatted. He then asked me if I wanted to go to dinner and we went to a place that was a favorite of his. Oh my god. We walked in from the wind to this cute place with a huge, roaring fire. It was rather romantic. The food was wonderful. I am a happy girl if I can have good duck and it was good!

We had the best time! We talked, ate, and had some wine. He showed me some more of his work (he is so talented). He offered to drive me back to my car at work (saving me from the cold and the joys of the Red Line). I was getting ready to get out of the car and then it happened. A very, very nice goodnight kiss :-) And he smelled so good too.

It was the perfect date. I drove home with a huge smile on my face. I can't wait until Saturday!

Third time's a charm!

Well so far I'm a few weeks into the online dating and it's been ok.
I get a wink for a cute guy nearby so I winked back. He sent back a great email. It was long, detailed and in complete sentences! We decide to meet for a coffee. I talked to him on the phone and oh boy, what a great voice he has :-)

We meet at Starbucks and I figure it will be a nice way to spend an hour. I walk in and he surprised me because he was right at the door. He was working on something and it's amazing how artistic and creative he is. Long story short, after 4 1/2 hours I had to go to another event. The time just flew by. He's funny, smart, literate, handsome, easy to talk to and such a nice guy. He gave me a nice hug when he walked me to my car as we watched the lunar eclipse.

We have plans for the theater next week and I am looking forward to it!

Hooray for Bollywood

So my limited exposure to Bollywood prior to Friday has solely been spoofs of the genre on the Simpsons. I was more than curious to see what Bollywood Girls Night would hold.
My friend made such an amazing dinner I still can't even believe it. I will have dreams about the okra and potato dish she made. And the lentils? Don't even get me started. They were beyond amazing.

The movie we saw was "Kal Ho Na Ho" (which translates to "Tomorrow May Or May Not Be").
I enjoyed it because it was so different from anything I have seen. The singing, the dancing, the colors. It was like walking into Times Square for the very first time. I didn't know where to look first.

My friend is a huge movie buff and sent me home with a movie that is more of an art film that a big Bollywood production. I am looking forward to watching it.

Passionate Kisses and Delicate Ears

So it's been a busy week. I have been a very popular girl in the dating world.
Over a 2 day period I had 2 dates. Date number one was responsible for the comment from the title about my ears. It's not a body part I generally get compliments on but hey. You when someone gives you a compliment about something and you immediately become self conscious about it? That's what happened. I suddenly could not stop thinking about my ears. As far as the kissing of the title, that was not to be found on either of these dates!

Both dates were fun but a study in contrasts. Date number one in Cambridge. Hanging out drinking good wine and imported beer eating mussels and frites. Date number two was a townie bar (thank god I wore jeans and not work clothes!) drinking beer eating dirt cheap, but good pulled pork and brisket.

Both men were gentlemen, funny, decent conversationalists and very happy to be in my company. Date one was extremely bitter about his ex and had a not so kind nickname for her. Date two has food issues. No fancy food, no orange food and an odd love of chain restaurants. So those two are a wash, but I knew that when I first saw them. No chemistry. No spark. Nothing.

So while these two didn't go well, I am not quite writing off online dating just yet.

Layers

I do like winter. I am thrilled that it finally feels that the season has come. I went snowboarding today in the snow and it was great. The problem with winter comes when you try to date or go out. It's a tough season to try to look your hottest. Static from hats, hat head, chapped lips, layers and layers of clothing and boots and mittens and scarf and coat. The city has been so icy lately it is impossible to wear heels, my preferred footwear. LL Bean is generally not the first name that comes to mind when I am getting dressed for an evening out. But I'd rather not twist an ankle or slip like so many people have.

So blue

Work has sucked. School is getting really, really busy. Date with man with no-name was meh. I drove into to work today and almost got hit by every crazy driver on the Pike and in the Stop and Shop parking lot. I have not been in the best of moods.

So I walked into my door tonight and sat down in front of the computer. A few clicks later I had reupped my sponsorship for a new sister through Women for Women. I asked for my sponsorship dollars to go either to Sudan, Afghanistan or Rwanda. In about 12 weeks I will get my sponsorship packet and be off and running. I would sponsor more women if I could but I am only one person and can only do this.

I got tired of feeling sorry for myself. So I am turning my blues into action and helping someone who really has something to feel bad about.

What's in a name?

So I met a guy on my crazy Friday out a few weeks back. He seemed nice enough so we've been in touch. We have plans to go out this weekend. The problem? I have no idea what his name is. He introduced himself to me (and my 3 friends) at the bar. None of us know what it is which is sad since clearly none of us were paying attention. . We are also not sure of his nationality. His accent was German. Or Russian. Or Spanish. When he calls me he doesn't say his name. I was hoping to get his voicemail but no such luck. I'm not sure of the etiquette, but I think we are past the point where I can just ask him point blank. So I am left to hope that he pays by credit card so I can sneak a peek at his name. Or I can ask him for his email address.

So essentially I am going out with indeterminate accent no-name guy. It should be interesting :-)