Adventures in House Hunting

After being a renter for ever and ever, I decided it was time to buy a house. That of course meant looking at houses. Thanks to my helpful realtor/friend wheels were in motion and in short order I had an online list of houses. It was a bit overwhelming but I quickly created a system and a spreadsheet of houses I wanted to see. I do indeed love lists and spreadsheets so this process became just like any other when I have to make a decision.

Luckily my realtor was game and in two afternoons we saw a heck of a lot of houses. Some were on the possibility list. More than a few were on the no way in hell list. It was a lot at once but it gave me a good sense of locations I wanted to move to and what I was looking for in a home. I have been pretty insulated from the foreclosure mess and it was eye opening to see how many homes there are still out there. Some were very sad and you clearly knew that the people moving out were not happy about it. I can understand being in a bad situation but it just seems wrong to destroy your house before moving out solely to spite the bank.

The few homes that were occupied were interesting. You can't help but walk through a house and get a sense of who lives there. We did run into pets. One home had a huge cat that was very friendly. One had a huge cat that was a bit standoffish. That was also the house with the free range chickens that made their appearance known as we were leaving. Upon opening the door to go, I was greeted with a chicken on the doorstep that startled me to no end! One home, which we had to wade through a sea of trash bags to enter, had the happiest white dog in a crate. It did appear that people lived there and she wasn't abandoned, but we did both wonder if we needed to rescue her. Unfortunate wallpaper seemed to be everywhere as well. We saw a few creepy basements that I would never set foot in to do laundry. One house smelled like pee. I still hope it was pet and not human but we didn't stay long enough to determine for sure which. There was the house with the murky pool. The house with the small deck taken up by the giant hot tub. There were a few with bars that would have suited me better if I was perhaps a 20 year old bachelor.

 In the end the last house we saw on the 2nd day, which wasn't even on my list, was the one that stuck in my head. So we'll see where it goes!

The Power of Women

It's no secret that I spend a lot of time with men being an IT professional. So it's truly a joy to be in situations where I am in the company of only women. I found myself in precisely this situation today at work. I am a part of the Women's Networking Group and they just kicked off a mentoring program. I signed up to get a mentor and also will be mentoring two women. I have done a lot of mentoring so far, not in a formal program. And I have never had an official mentor. I have been good about seeking out people as I have needed but I think it will be really helpful to have a dedicated mentor I can meet with on a regular basis.

The two women I am mentoring are just great! I get along with them and they get along with each other too. The meeting today ended and we spent about another half hour talking with each other until we all had to head back to our desks. I was actually happy to have been able to offer a bit of advice to one of my proteges already and am so thrilled at the prospect to do more. It was funny as my mentor was leaving she told my two proteges they had a great mentor in me. It was flattering!

This week was a busy one. Anytime I have an all day meeting it just throws me off my game a bit. Having a two day meeting this week just made me that much further behind. So it was very helpful to have the mentor meeting today. It was great meeting new people and also to be in a room full of women sharing their experiences, getting acquainted and having a few laughs. The candy on the tables was a nice touch as well. I feel energized and ready to take on the world again! Of course I have a slew of things to read as part of  this program but homework will wait until this weekend.

Long Weekend

I was glad to take some time off and have an extra long weekend. I am glad I did given how busy I was. I managed to visit five states in three days. (ME, NH, MA, CT, NY)and had I felt like doing more driving I would have thrown RI and VT in for good measure!

The reason for heading to Maine was a trip to York Beach where my Dad was vacationing. I have not been on vacation with my Dad and brother since I was in high school and my Dad was married to my first stepmom. So a very long time indeed. Though my Dad goes to York Beach every year, he would normally go with my current stepmom. Given she has wanted nothing to do with either my brother or myself for over a year, we got a chance to have some time with just our Dad. It was fun and the weather was great. Being at the beach of course I had to get some salt water taffy and have been eating it non stop since then. Also being the beach, I had a great lobster roll with some homemade potato chips. You can't go wrong with a lobster roll in Maine!

While Maine was fun, I had plans further south so back in the car I was. Luckily I just love driving my new car and it's so much fun! NYC is my adopted hometown and I always like going back, even for a day. I had lunch and hit the Union Square Greenmarket for more produce than I planned, like the Seckel pears in the above photo. One of the best things they have is cat grass. While grass is easy to grow, I can't keep up with the kitten who loves it and can wipe out a pot in no time. So I came home with three pots of grass for her and she has been grazing and thrilled all weekend! After all that driving, I was saving Sunday and Monday as days to just relax. It was nice to turn on the oven again and do some baking. I had a lot of produce so I made potato salad, roasted Romano beans, bacon (for a BLT), chocolate chip cookies and slow roasted cherry tomatoes that took a couple of hours and are heaven. I always figure if I am making a mess in the kitchen I may as well do everything at once. With all of that, I am ready to start the work week!

Dating Sideshow

It seems to me that I could put together a circus sideshow of some of the men I have dated recently. I would only charge a nominal fee but could guarantee entertainment.

First up would be the man who claimed he didn't believe in the Internet. Yes, he actually said those words. This was a second (and last) date and I had, up until the point this gem was delivered, assumed his biggest flaw was apparent alcoholism. I was proven wrong by his utterance. I assured him that while the Tooth Fairy or Easter Bunny may not exist, the Internet indeed does. I told him it was more that he didn't believe in using the Internet. Given that he had an AOL email address, that seemed to be accurate. He was pretty inebriated by the time the date was over. When I called to tell him we were never going out again, he spent the first few minutes of that call quizzing me about what smartphone and data plan he should upgrade to. I told him he couldn't afford my consulting fee.

The next is the man who couldn't handle grief. Actually he was incapable of recognizing or handling any emotions (mine or his). So when I had to put my cat to sleep, he disappeared for days. And when I finally sent him an email asking what was up, he told me that he figured I wouldn't want to hear from him because he had never had a pet. I patiently (ok not really patiently) explained that grief is a pretty universal emotion whether for a pet or a person. He had some other issues so I broke up with him. It was adult and handled well. Then, about two weeks later, I got an email from him stating that he was moving on and couldn't have any more contact with me. The clue that we were moving on was the breakup phone call. Apparently he had a delayed reaction or needed to have the last word. Last I heard he was heading to a retreat to learn how to be more of a man. He's going to need quite a few retreats.

This brings us to the man who would not stop talking about sex. He was a friend of a friend and a set up. Before we had even met he was sending me text messages telling me that I was hot, asking what I was wearing and one very cheesy Roses Are Red poem. Our date was at 4pm on a Sunday. I am not even sure what meal that is suppose to be. Dinner? Lunch? Delayed Brunch? I got to the restaurant a little early and got really annoyed when he kept texting me from the parking lot asking if I was in the restaurant and where was I exactly. I was at the front (at that hour it wasn't like the place was packed). We sat down and he proceeded to explain to me how open minded and sexually experienced he was. We hadn't even placed an order or gotten water yet. He then asked me if I had sex toys, if I was wearing a thong, if I found it hot to pleasure a man while he was driving (no I do not as I enjoy personal safety and arriving at my destination in one piece) and if I played my cards right I could go to Ireland with him this summer. It was at this point that I ordered a whiskey. A double.

He then proceeded to tell me, in great detail, his entire list of what he is looking for in a woman. By this point, I had a pretty good sense of what he was looking for but the items on his list were interesting. I kept pointing out the ones that were not me. He also kept calling me a "good girl" which made me feel like a golden retriever. The date finally ended and he then texted me at 5:30am on Monday to ask for a second date. There was not a chance in hell of date number two before the text. Waking me up on a Monday before my alarm went off just confirmed it.

Goodbye My Pretty Girl

Jack was indeed a pretty cat. She was not the friendliest but her black and white markings were pretty. When she was little, and she was a very small kitten, she had a perfect white ring around her black tail. As she grew, it dissipated a bit but you could still get a hint of it. She was also the first cat I ever got on my own.

I got her in CT. She was in a big bucket of fellow cow kittens and when I reached my hand in to pet them, she crawled right up my arm and perched on my shoulder like a parrot. I brought her home and she promptly hid under my bed for the next few days. I was under the impression that she was a boy, hence the name. Her first visit to my vet proved she was more of a Jackie than a Jack, but by that time the name had stuck. She was actually so small I once almost threw her away. She had crawled into a bag I was putting trash in and I closed it up and put it by the trashcan. About 10 minutes later I heard this tiny meow and there she was in the trash.

I had her for 16 years. Together we lived in 3 states, went through many boyfriends and moved more times than I can recount. The last big move from NYC to MA was a long drive due to traffic and she actually lost her voice because she had meowed so much. For about two weeks after that she could only squeak at me.
 
She was a good judge of people and once bit a boyfriend of mine on a place where men do not want to get bit. Given he was not a very nice person, she realized it well before I did. When my relationship with him ended, he got angry at me and threw her against the wall. She was not a big cat and I thought she was dead. Luckily she was ok.  My Irish temper certainly made an appearance that night. I never doubted her assessment of a person.

She loved corn on the cob. As a kitten she once pulled a cob from the trash and ate it clean. Whenever summer rolled around and I brought home corn, she was a very happy cat and would start chewing on the husks.

Her meow was much larger than she was. And for some reason every time I took a shower she would sit outside and meow at me until I paid attention. Then she would run out of the bathroom. I have no idea why. She would also meow if you were sitting in her spot on the couch. And she would keep meowing at you until you moved out of her way.

She was an excellent hunter. She caught her last mouse and promptly brought it to me in the middle of the night. She was so proud of herself and so loud. She woke me and the kittens up. I thought she might swat them away from her mouse but instead she nudged it towards them as if to show them what she had done. I did point out to the kittens they should pay attention as all future mousing falls to them!

I will miss her persistence that dinner was anytime after I came home. Didn't matter if it was 6pm or 2pm or if I just ran out to get the mail. And if I did make the mistake of feeding her early, she would be right back at her bowl at the usual dinner time as if she hadn't already eaten.

It all seems a bit surreal that she is not here. It was hard seeing the three bowls at dinner time. The kittens have been looking in all the usual spots for her. It was a comfort seeing how peaceful she was this morning. She had kidney and heart issues and she had been uncomfortable the last few days. It's always such a hard thing to do but she definitely told me it was her time. I am lucky to have a great vet.

So I go to bed tonight with one less pet. I know the tears will stop with time but I am not there yet. She was a good cat and though she was a bit grumpy, she was sweet as well. She loved her dog and was by his side when he died. His bed became her bed, which means I have the biggest LL Bean cat bed around. Thank you my pretty girl for being in my life for so long. I love you and miss you.

Is it Too Late to be a Girl Scout?

I never was a Girl Scout. I remember bringing the permission slip to join them home to my Mom when I was in elementary school. She asked me if I wanted to join. I said no and that was that. Obviously there are more girls out there who want to join than not because it is their 100th anniversary. I generally don't give much thought to the Girl Scouts, except for the cookies, but I have been happy to see them at various women in technology events over the last few months. On one hand it's great because they always bring the aforementioned cookies with them! But it's also heartening to see young girls being exposed to women in the STEM fields (Science, Technology, Engineering and Math) which is something I never had at their age.

So while I am happy to see the future generation being exposed to career paths I wasn't exposed it, it's tough to be really ecstatic about it given the current political state in this country. You know things are out of hand when even the Girl Scouts are not safe from a clueless politician claiming they are really a group with nefarious intent. Given it's a group for girls and girls eventually grow up to be women and there currently is a war on women, clearly that's where the issue lies.

I am not sure why conservatives have chosen to wage this war on women and it's frankly pissing me off. I do not take kindly to anyone bossing me around about the choices I make about my health or my body. Or for that matter bossing anyone else around.