It was oddly fitting that I found myself in the middle of a candlelit labyrinth this New Year's eve. My life indeed has felt rather labyrinthine this year with it's various twists and turns.
I am very happy to be staring down the last hours of this year that has found me recovering from a broken heart and shedding way too many tears. It's been a year that has sorely tested my patience (in spite of all the yoga I do)and resilience.
It finds me facing a new relationship with my Mom, who is still losing her fight with the demons haunting her. Feeling distant from her for the first time ever has been very sad and Christmas Eve was not a fun time. It helped talking to my Grandmother this week to know that I am not alone in dealing with my Mom, though sometimes I feel that way. I know there will be some difficult conversations to start off this new year, but they are needed and I will be happy to get things out in the open.
My job continues to be source of stress with a final slap in the face proving no one in my group does know or care all the hard work I do.
My love live found a lot of dates for me this year, but not any that really stuck. A few weeks ago I was facing my busy time at work and I had frankly given up going on anymore dates this year. I was pleasantly surprised to have managed to squeeze two fun dates in before the end of this year.
I find that all the drama of the last year has really helped me to define what it is that I want for the new year. It is now up to me to make these things happen. Part of the evening tonight involved writing down things to cast off for this year and then burning that piece of paper. I do enjoy that process and it really does help me let go. It was also a great time to catch up with a dear friend who is probably one of the sweetest people I know.
It's debatable if I will make it until midnight but I don't care. I am happy with the day and evening I have had and am more than ready to say goodbye to 2009.
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