Goodbye 2009

It was oddly fitting that I found myself in the middle of a candlelit labyrinth this New Year's eve. My life indeed has felt rather labyrinthine this year with it's various twists and turns.

I am very happy to be staring down the last hours of this year that has found me recovering from a broken heart and shedding way too many tears. It's been a year that has sorely tested my patience (in spite of all the yoga I do)and resilience.

It finds me facing a new relationship with my Mom, who is still losing her fight with the demons haunting her. Feeling distant from her for the first time ever has been very sad and Christmas Eve was not a fun time. It helped talking to my Grandmother this week to know that I am not alone in dealing with my Mom, though sometimes I feel that way. I know there will be some difficult conversations to start off this new year, but they are needed and I will be happy to get things out in the open.

My job continues to be source of stress with a final slap in the face proving no one in my group does know or care all the hard work I do.

My love live found a lot of dates for me this year, but not any that really stuck. A few weeks ago I was facing my busy time at work and I had frankly given up going on anymore dates this year. I was pleasantly surprised to have managed to squeeze two fun dates in before the end of this year.

I find that all the drama of the last year has really helped me to define what it is that I want for the new year. It is now up to me to make these things happen. Part of the evening tonight involved writing down things to cast off for this year and then burning that piece of paper. I do enjoy that process and it really does help me let go. It was also a great time to catch up with a dear friend who is probably one of the sweetest people I know.

It's debatable if I will make it until midnight but I don't care. I am happy with the day and evening I have had and am more than ready to say goodbye to 2009.

Busy, Busy, Busy

Once again I am in the midst of a chaotic December. Work of course is so busy and when you add to that all the other holiday obligations time is short. So of course I did what anyone in this situation would do. I decided to have a party last weekend. I love to entertain and was happy to have a houseful of people. It was a bitterly cold night but my house was warm and full of conversation and laughter. The white bean soup and chili were a hit as well as the very popular bottles of wine my friends brought. Other friends brought me a lovely pair of earrings that I cannot stop wearing. I think my other earrings are getting jealous!

The party also gave me an excuse to decorate my house. Stockings were hung, tree was trimmed and it looked quite nice. I love walking into my house and smelling the tree. Puts me right in the holiday spirit.

I am tying to have the happiness from last week carry me over during this very stressful week but it's been difficult. Right now I just want to get my work project done, presents wrapped and get through Christmas with a minimum of drama. Fingers crossed!