Thanksgiving

We all have that one dish that makes an appearance each Thanksgiving that no one knows where it came from or who started it. But there it is. Cranberry Relish with walnuts. Ambrosia. Jell-O molds. For my family it is Green Bean Casserole.

I don't even know what's really in it other than the beans and the crispy fried onions for the topping. My mother loves the stuff. She also has a love of stuffing that I can't quite understand either, but that's another story. She makes it in spite of the rest of us mocking her. She asks us to try it. Once, many moons ago, I did. It did not impress me.

We did not have Green Bean Casserole this year. Thanksgiving was good, but seemed a bit more subdued. I think the loss of my grandfather this summer has got everyone shaken up. It seems as if the whole family is unsure of their footing now.

Let's talk turkey

This fall while riding my bike I noticed that my neighbors had gotten some rather unattractive lawn ornaments. Upon closer observation I realized they were in fact four turkeys. Up close they weren't so bad. Apparently I am not the only New Englander with turkeys in the back yard. On NPR today there was a tale of turkeys from a town outside of Boston. Apparently they had a flock of turkeys with a very aggressive tom or two. The most aggressive Tom met his end on the very crowded Route 9 but not before terrorizing and attacking the residents.

So this Thanksgiving, should you find yourself face to face with an aggressive turkey (and not the kind in the plastic with Butterball stamped on it) be strong and use a broom to thwack it away! This was advice they offered. It cracked me up. Who has a broom that handily within reach? I'd be rushed by turkeys before I could get my broom. And yes, I know that it could be a 20 or 30 pound bird and they do have a talon but still, it's a bird!

Forgive me not

"Once a woman has forgiven her man, she must not reheat his sins for breakfast." - Marlene Dietrich

"One forgives to the degree that one loves." - Francois de La Rochefoucauld

If you say that you forgive someone for a past wrong, does that automatically require the forgiven to do penance and re-hash the event? Can you get forgiveness without having to pay a penance? If you are the forgiver are you then entitled to unlimited rehashing of the event in order to completely grant forgiveness? If this is a requirement then is it truly forgiveness? Does this requirement for going over and over the events of the past mean that you are truly not forgiven? Does it indicate that you have not truly come to terms with the past?

It's quite a conundrum. It feels to me like telling someone you are sorry when you don't really mean it. If you say "I have forgiven you" but then make me explain again and again what happened have you truly forgiven me?

How are you helpful?

I have had a pretty rough few weeks. Nothing major but it was disruptive, aggravating, disappointing, stressful, and thoroughly not fun. I am very in touch with my sense of empathy, as anyone who spends five minutes with me can attest. So while my friends and loved ones listened to me vent and offered their sympathy, I did keep in mind that there are others out there who have things a lot worse than me.

Why is it then, that when told of my saga one such acquaintance decided to basically tell me that it could have been worse? I mean my house didn't burn down with my dog in it like a friend of his. All I wanted was a bit of acknowledgement that my week was tough instead I got a diatribe on how much worse it could have been. Gee, thanks. I feel so much better already.

Election Ennui

Normally I love to vote but I am so glad that Tuesday is Election Day. I am so sick and tired of all the stupid, negative ads that have been playing incessantly on tv. It's aggravating. If I hear one more commercial about how all hell will break loose if the grocery stores gain the right to sell wine I think I will scream.

Since I am not a target group for politicians (single, no children yet, renter) you would think that I would not be as politically involved as I am. What spurs me on is that I truly hold strong to the belief that my predecessors fought hard for me to be able to go and vote on Election Day. The fact that women were only granted the right to vote only with the passage of the 19th amendment of the Constitution in 1920 makes me obligated to cast my ballot and I do so proudly.

I have also decided this election season that any candidate who had supporters who left their campaign fliers under my car windshield at the train station automatically does not get my vote. There is nothing worse than getting off the train in the dark, getting in your car and realizing that there is a stupid flyer under your windshield wiper. It is beyond aggravating.

Election Day also makes me think of when I was a child how my grandmother used to work the polls. I would go with my parents and see my gram chatting with all her girlfriends and giving people their ballots. I couldn’t wait to be grown up enough to vote. So this Tuesday when I wield my Sharpie marker I will remember her and proudly do my civic duty.